Becoming The Fathers God Wants Us To Be

A Fathers’ Day Message from Thomas McKenna

Dear Friend,

“For this reason I kneel before the Father, from whom every family in heaven and on earth is named, that he may grant you in accord with the riches of his glory to be strengthened with power through his Spirit in the inner self” (Ephesians 3:14-16)

While we know very well that Jesus called God His Father, we often overlook the fact God sharesthe gift of His fatherhood with all men, at least, all who desire it. 

Every man who generates a child becomes a father by that biological fact. If he is honest and responsible for his loved ones, he becomes a provider, a nurturer, and a protector. These are all holy things, even if one is not motivated strictly by Christian faith to live them out.  

We all know the role that the good St. Joseph played in a human sense in the care and nurturing of the Holy Family. 

But fatherhood doesn’t end with providing for the material wellbeing of our families. As necessary as these things are, they are largely the external dimensions of fatherhood. The inner dimension of fatherhood comes when he exercises spiritual fatherhood on their behalf.

Hidden in the decades of silence in Nazareth, good St. Joseph exercised his spiritual fatherhood toward his blessed Son, Jesus, by teaching Him to pray, forming His human mind in the truth of the scriptures, and imbuing Him with a sense of the meaning and dignity of work. 

These are the deeper aspects of fatherhood—and easily the more important ones. 

But no one becomes a spiritual father unless he asks for that gift from our Father in heaven. God is the one “from whom every family in heaven and earth is named.” Is that not an magnificent description of God the Father? 

St. Paul claims that there are not only families on earth but “in heaven”—why is that? It is simply because of God’s gift of spiritual fatherhood. The phrase reminds men that being a father is a spiritual reality that transcends this world. 

Fatherhood descends from heaven as a gift from God. In turn, spiritual fathers give that bit of heaven to their families as a blessing and a promise. Families of faith certainly enjoy the blessings of faith even in this world, but there is a promise of more blessings to come.

Don’t we all hope that we will one day be reunited with all of our loved ones in the great mansions of heaven? Those families will be intact and perfectly peaceful in heaven in a way they could never be on earth! 

Isn’t heaven described as a massive wedding banquet? Families put on wedding banquets, so our families will be there to welcome us into the hall for the celebration when our time comes. That is our hope anyway!

And no doubt, spiritual fathers drag many of our weak and failing loved ones over the rocky shoals of this sinful world to the shores of heaven. That’s what spiritual fatherhood is for, isn’t it? 

One final word. 

God’s Fatherhood is so powerful that he even shares it with those who have not been blessed with the gift of biological children. Countless single men (and widowers) seek to give themselves in a fatherly way to others while they have time, and that’s because God lavishes His gift of fatherhood on all those men who ask for it.

It is also true of every celibate priest who sustains a community of faith by his spiritual nurturing and care for souls. He becomes a true spiritual father when he imitates the Father of all goodness and gives himself unselfishly for their wellbeing. 

On this Fathers’ Day, let us “kneel beforethe Father, from whom every family in heaven and on earth is named” and thank Him for His innumerable temporal and spiritual gifts that sustain us in this earthly life, and above all, for the gift of fatherhood.

And men—let us never cease to ask Him for the grace to become the fathers He wishes us to be!

Your friend in Christ,



Thomas J McKenna

Founder and President

Catholic Action for Faith and Family
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P.S. Speaking of fathers, we are honoring 49 years of spiritual fatherhood from Cardinal Burke with a Spiritual Bouquet! Click here <[link removed]?> to add your gift.



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