Have you ever had a moment when you’ve felt immense pride? The feeling of great accomplishment. Perhaps achieving an important victory. And, it made you feel almost invincible? That you were ‘on top of the world?’ Well, hopefully, we’ve all had these kinds of moments at various times in our lives. But they come with an unexpected challenge – or risk? Our sense of ego overwhelms us. We can feel and act in ways where we exude an air of unjustified superiority and alienate those around us. Importantly, these are the times when humility needs to be our watchword. When empathizing, listening to others and keeping our ego ‘in check’ should be the focus of the day.
Imagine a moment from many years ago. On the fateful eve of the Allied invasion of Sicily during World War II, Dwight Eisenhower decided to write a letter to his wife describing the emotions of the moment. In the letter he would write, “Everything we could think of has been done, the troops are fit, everybody is doing his best. The answer is in the lap of the gods.” Even as a man of incredible power and ultimately one of the great leaders of the last century, his words demonstrate a certain sense of humility we don’t often see these days. He recognized the enormity of such a moment and in doing so, he also recognized that the success of such an endeavor doesn’t lie with just one man, but so much more that he ultimately could not control. All he could do was to prepare himself, and others, as best he could. And by doing so, the invasion of Sicily, and eventually the liberation of Europe from Nazi rule, was successful.
We tend to place a lot of emphasis on personal accomplishments, our appearance, and how we are perceived by others in our culture. This self-aggrandizement unfortunately comes with a cost - humility. It’s a virtue we don’t usually hear much about in public discourse. Why then is it so important? First, let’s start with how we understand humility. In short, humility is a practice in modesty, a recognition of our strengths and of our weaknesses. It’s an acknowledgment, not a judgment, of our own individual value as human beings, that we have both strengths and weaknesses, and that’s ok. I tend to think of humility as the great unifier. This is because whenever I meet or interact with someone who demonstrates humility I feel more at ease, because with humility comes a great respect for oneself and respect for others and their own experiences.
The fact of the matter is we all go through life with our own biases and opinions, looking to be accepted, heard, or validated, it’s part of human nature. Sometimes it means that we don’t actively listen, and instead we look for approval or to defend ourselves rather than for what’s right in the moment. As rational beings, it’s oddly irrational. But the ability to do something not because we seek recognition for said act, or because we want to be right, but because it’s the right thing to do is a powerful virtue. If you think about it, humility most often shows up when we serve others. It’s an absence of arrogance or entitlement and it often promotes empathy. It allows us to consider other perspectives, reducing our own bias, creating the foundations for dialogue, understanding, and compromise, something I think we can all agree is lacking in our society. And the great thing is it’s something that all of us have the ability to practice each and every day, just like Ike did even in the most trying of times.
So, this week, why not have a little fun? Try practicing some humility in a conscious way in a few situations where you find yourself interacting with others. Then, take stock of how it felt, how you were received and any insights you may have developed. I suspect you’ll find this little experiment to be truly worthwhile.
