Once upon a time...
Every Who down in Who-ville Liked progress a lot But Joe Manchin And his donors in Big Oil Did NOT
That Joe HATED progress! The whole Senate session!
He’d stand there all session, just hating the Whos Watching each day with his face on the news Or staring down from his desk with a sour, grinchy frown At the voters with placards below in their town.
For he knew everyone down in Who-ville beneath Was busy now, fighting for COVID relief “And they want fair elections!” he snarled with a sneer! “They keep visiting my offices! The ones far, and near!” Then he growled with his Grinch fingers nervously drumming. “I must find some way to stop this vote from coming!”
For Tomorrow he knew If his “no” vote was tallied All the Whos would wake The activists would be rallied!
And then! Oh the noise! Oh the noise! Noise! Noise! Noise! That’s one thing he hated! The NOISE NOISE NOISE NOISE!
The Whos wouldn’t let up They’d keep calling his phone No matter the time They’d keep calling his home, every day for a week And a month And a year!
They’d call about climate, they’d call about voting, They’d call about democracy, and the values worth promoting.
And the more Manchin thought of this Pro-Progress-Call The more Sen. Joe thought, “I can’t bear it at all” “Why for so many months I’ve put up with it now!” “I must stop these activists from calling!” “But how?”
Then he got an idea! An awful idea! Joe Manchin got a wonderful, awful idea!
“I know just what to do!” he laughed in his throat. I’ll use an old Senate trick to sink the whole boat! With the Jim Crow Filibuster The majority loses I’ll refuse to fix our democracy Then Kyrsten and I will leave on our Cruzes.”
THEN He called up McConnell He called up his donors He called up obstructionists, “no” voters and it’ll-never-pass moaners. He called Schumer and Biden And said “I won’t play ball” And they grimaced and whined But let him keep his stonewall.
As the months rolled on by Sen. Joe kept up his rejections Month after month He blocked fixing our elections
He blocked lowering drug prices and fair representation He blocked healthcare and climate action – all good things for our nation! He stopped every vote, as quick as a flash Why Joe Manchin even balked at getting parents spare cash!
Then he stuffed all those bills in the back of a drawer And said to the activists “don’t bother trying for more.”
It was nearly the New Year Activists’ hearts were heavy And on Capitol Hill, the Senate was ready To go home on vacation Joe had stopped all their bills! Gerrymandering! Drug price negotiation!
In a single “NO” pile on his desk he had lumped them. And as December came, he was ready to dump them.
“I’ll go home for Christmas” he said with delight. “By the time we return, they’ll have forgotten this fight.” Coming back to his office on January Third Joe opened his door, and soft sound he heard
“That’s not much,” grinned Joe Manchin “Not a call do I hear.” So he paused. And Sen. Joe put his hand to his ear. But he DID hear a sound rising over the snow It started out low, then it started to grow
But the sound wasn’t SMALL! Why this sound sounded strong It couldn’t be so! He was sure they had gone! He stared down at Who-ville And Joe popped his eyes Then he shook! What he saw was a shocking surprise
Every Who down in Who-vill the tall and the small Was dialing their Senators – with no prompting at all! He hadn’t stopped activists from coming. They came! Somehow or other, they came just the same!
And Sen. Joe, his grinchy-feet ice-cold in the snow Stood puzzling and puzzling “how could it be so?” They came despite “no”s, they came despite “nevers” They came even when I swore I would ignore all their levers!
And he puzzled three hours till his puzzler was sore Then Sen. Joe thought of something he hadn’t before “Maybe progress” he thought “is just so essential,” “Even when I say no, they believe in potential.”
And what happened then? Well, in Who-ville they say That Joe Manchin’s heart Grew three sizes that day!
And the minute his heart didn’t feel quite so tight He cleaned up his desk, through the bright January light And he brought back the bills! All the votes he could muster! And he He himself Fixed the filibuster.
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