Each autistic person has their own strengths and challenges. We are
proud to share their stories in support of our continued work to
increase understanding and acceptance, across the spectrum and
throughout the life span

Meet Nolan F.

In September of 2020, Nolan's pediatrician suggested to his mom,
Stephanie, that getting a hearing test and contacting Child
Developmental Services and their local school district could be the
start of uncovering some of the answers to the many questions she had
about her son's developmental progress. Three months later,
after undergoing many tests and doctor visits, Nolan was diagnosed
with autism spectrum disorder, social communication disorder and mixed
receptive-expressive language disorder. He experienced lack of
coordination, lack of expected normal physiological development in
childhood and delayed milestones in childhood.

Just 19 days after his diagnosis, Nolan began receiving services
thanks to the relentless efforts of his mom, who understood the
significance of early support in improving Nolan's long-term
outcomes.

"I think it is important to point out the dates and how swiftly
everything came together, as this was in the middle of the pandemic.
As soon as our pediatrician mentioned autism, I knew I had to get on
the phone and onto the computer to make calls, send emails and
schedule appointments so that Nolan would be set up for
success."

Since that time, Nolan has been receiving extensive supports from the
staff at Three Bridges School in Three Bridges, New Jersey. Stephanie
says her son's teachers in his Pre-K special education class
have implemented an Individualized Education Program (IEP) and provide
applied behavior analysis (ABA) therapy, as well as a steady
and invaluable foundation of support.

"We have always been met with the utmost kindness, patience and
support there. This started from my first call to our pre-school case
manager and continued with all of his teachers. Even the bus drivers have been instrumental
in his daily life. There are many people who have provided encouraging
guidance to help us along our journey. Every day, Nolan leaves his
house with a huge smile on his face, and he comes back home with that
same smile. Although he cannot communicate how his day was, you can
read his face and you can tell he is happy. To me, this is
priceless."

Since he was diagnosed at 3, Nolan missed the cutoff to receive early
intervention services which are available for infants and toddlers in
New Jersey up to age 3. Stephanie says she regrets not having her son
tested earlier after seeing how much his sister, Sloan, 2, has
benefited from the crucial services after she was diagnosed.

"My daughter, Sloan, was diagnosed at an earlier age and is
also non-verbal. I'm so thankful she qualified for early
intervention with speech and occupational therapies because
we've seen results in a matter of weeks. I believe Nolan would
have benefited greatly from the extra services. I encourage all
parents to be proactive and reach out to their pediatricians if they
suspect something could be wrong."

Learn more about Nolan through the words of his mom, Stephanie, in
this Spectrum Spotlight Q&A: [link removed]

What are Nolan's strengths?

Since attending school, we have all witnessed him excelling with
following directions, motor imitation, eye contact, toy play, drawing
lines, stacking blocks, coloring simple shapes and playing with other
children from school on the playground. Nolan is now recognizing
colors and pointing them out on different objects. He also loves
singing the alphabet and identifying the letters when he sees them.

Nolan is very affectionate - he likes to give kisses and hugs to his
family and loves animals, especially his dogs, Indy and Coco!

Can you share some of Nolan's challenges as well?

Nolan has significant delays in speech and language skills for his
age. Since he cannot say what he wants or how he feels, we must try to
interpret what he is trying to communicate. However, there are times
when we do not know what he wants which often leads to his
frustration. Nolan can be hyperactive in certain situations and has a
short attention span.

Nolan has also always struggled with sleeping. He never napped or
slept well as a baby, and that still continues today. He's also
a picky eater, although he eats healthy. We have a hard time
introducing new foods.

What are Nolan's hobbies / favorite things?

Nolan thoroughly enjoys watching music videos on YouTube - he
imitates the motions and tries to sing along with the lyrics to his
favorite songs. Nolan loves being outside and running. He is actually
very fast! But he also likes looking at nature and seeing the weather,
such as rain or a thunderstorm. He enjoys looking through books and
identifying objects that he can recognize. Our house is a Disney
house, so he loves Mickey Mouse! Most of the Pixar movies are in
constant rotation playing throughout the day.

Can you share what it's like to be a mom of a child on the
autism spectrum?

Family has always been my most important priority. My happiness comes
from my children's happiness. Having a child on the autism
spectrum is just an added bonus to me. Of course, there are rough
days, but more often than not, my days are so fulfilling and
rewarding. Nolan is this pure, happy, loving little boy who lights up
the room wherever he goes. I am constantly asked, "is he always
this happy?" And the answer is YES, Nolan is constantly smiling
ear to ear bringing joy to those he meets. I am so proud to be his
mother and cannot wait to see all the wonderful things he may do in
the future because of his kind soul.

What was your initial reaction when you first were told your son was
on the spectrum?

My initial reaction was one of denial and doubt. Nobody ever wants to
think that there may be something wrong with their child. And then
your mind automatically goes into guilt, blame and trying to find
answers to questions like "how am I going to protect my
child?" I felt very alone and was left with more questions than
answers upon the diagnosis.

If you could give one piece of advice to other parents who have a
child/children on the spectrum, what would you say?

Just like with all children, this is just the beginning of a
beautiful new life. You have the opportunity to rethink things in fun,
creative ways that are going to help your child navigate through their
world and into yours.

How have Nolan's siblings played a role in providing him with
guidance and support through the years?

Nolan's siblings are young, but I know how impactful each of
them has been so far. Gunnar, 8, his older brother, is already
well-aware of protecting and watching out for Nolan. They enjoy
running around, chasing each other with the football, making pretend
plays and touchdowns. Gunnar helps teach Nolan by building forts,
playing games, and being a big brother. Nolan has always been so
gentle with the arrival of both his little sisters, Sloan 2, and
Skylar 11 months. He always wanted to feed them bottles and show his
empathetic side as a big brother. I cannot wait to see how each of
their sibling relationships blossom over the years.

How have you learned to advocate for your son since his diagnosis?

First and foremost, you know your child better than anybody. Never
let anyone tell you differently. With that being said, I've
learned to advocate so that I am well informed about Nolan's
needs. I've learned more about rights and services that your
child can receive, become more confident and try never to lose sight
of what's most important in life. Being able to communicate
clearly and not be afraid to ask questions, even if I need to take
some time and come back with more questions after a meeting.

What is your connection to autism speaks and how have they provided
support to you and your family?

When you're first given your diagnosis, you're given the
label and not much else. So, I started trying to do my own research to
find out what happens next. That's when I found Autism Speaks. I
started looking at their website and the endless links to find answers
to all the questions I had. That led to reading all of the stories of
the other people in the autism community. I was so moved, inspired and
overjoyed that there was a place that could allow people to be
authentic and share their real-life story with strangers needing to
know they are not alone on their journey. This is right around the
same time that I found the Autism Speaks Walks. I started our team,
"We Speak for Nolan." I am elated to be walking on his
behalf, raising money to support the work of Autism Speaks on behalf
of people with autism and being around others in the autism community.

What are five words that best describe Nolan?

Magnetic, fearless, adventurous, loving, zestful




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