Children's Defense Fund

Dear John,

When I think about celebrating Mother’s Day, I’m celebrating how blessed my son and I have been to weather the storm of single parenting. I’m celebrating how far we’ve come, together.

Over the past year, my son Xavier and I have gotten to spend more time together as a result of the pandemic. We watch Marvel movies, we work out together, and we really just enjoy each other’s company. These moments are all precious to me, as Xavier is 16-years-old and beginning the college application process, so I will soon be an empty-nester.

At 16-years-old, Xavier is still my baby, but he lives in a country that sees Black teens, especially young Black men, as adults instead of children—and perceives my kind, loving son as a threat merely because he’s a young Black man. After far too many instances of police violence against Black men were so widely broadcasted during the past year, I am especially aware of what that unfair adultification of my son will mean if he comes into contact with authority figures who put their own perceived safety above his. I picture him getting his driver’s license, and I am honestly fearful for his safety—how can I protect him if he’s pulled over by the police? So this Mother’s Day, I’m going to give him some extra love.

Xavier is on a path to major in engineering. He’s a stellar student and community citizen, and I’m so proud of him. It’s my greatest assignment to support him along this path. These days, I’m relishing our last few Mother’s Days together before he takes those next steps in his journey.

My relationship with Xavier is one of my greatest blessings. If our story of love, support, and appreciation makes you think about a mother or caregiver in your life, please make a gift to the Children’s Defense Fund in honor of that loved one. You’ll be celebrating your love while supporting the well-being of children and their families nationwide.