Speak less. Speak last. When I coach and teach about leadership, that’s one of my mantras to help managers recognize and exercise their power, and how they can impact a conversation. When I say speak last, it doesn’t mean “have the last word,” it means giving everyone the opportunity to be heard, seen and understood.
A practical tool I teach in our leadership programs is the “art of listening.” It sounds counterintuitive, but a key to being a good newsroom leader is to speak less and listen more. Being a good listener is a skill set and something we can all practice. I also teach this during my “Having Difficult Conversations'” session, because the key to having difficult conversations is being able to understand with empathy and intention. In that session I teach a method called “The loop,” a simple circle for a good listening conversation.
Here’s how it goes:
Listen for what seems most important to the other person.
Paraphrase what you heard.
Check-in. Ask with curiosity if you got it right. Sense hesitation from the other person? Go back to step 1 until you get it right.
Dig deeper: “Tell me more”. Invite the other person to investigate beyond their usual talking points.
Try practicing this! In your next meeting, resist the urge to jump right in. You’ll be surprised how much you learn about yourself and your team.
