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Dear Greenland: Sorry our President is a Moron
The people of America have zero desire to go to war with you, or take you over, and we have no idea why our president (who is a moron) is once again pushing for it.
We can only imagine how stressful his threats must be, particularly in light of his actions elsewhere, and we are sorry you have to deal with this.
But the people of America do not want a war, and we will do our best to keep our moron president from launching one. And we will try much harder in the future to avoid electing people like him again.
Sincerely, the people of America
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