VANITY, UNFAIR!

Donald Trump’s top White House appointee just handed his critics a bonanza of dirt and damning quotes to fling back at him and his team. What was she thinking?

• White House Chief of Staff Susie Wiles is famous for plugging President Donald Trump’s incredibly leaky ship. His second term has been tight as a drum compared to his early days, with far fewer embarrassing stories sourced to ump-teen unnamed officials. But she hilariously blew up that reputation today, when Vanity Fair dropped a two-part series in which Wiles made what the New York Times called, in its understated way, a series of “pungent assessments” about Trump’s whole gang.

• In other words, she threw them all under the bus — and then backed up over them. The real question is: Why? Did she confuse this reporter with her therapist? “She’s never ever sloppy,” a senior White House official told What A Day, stunned and confused about the Wiles shitshow. Here are some of the wildest moments:

• President Donald Trump: He has “an alcoholic’s personality.”

• Vice President JD Vance: He has been “a conspiracy theorist for a decade.”

• Elon Musk: “He’s an avowed ketamine [user]. And he sleeps in a sleeping bag in the [Executive Office Building] in the daytime. And he’s an odd, odd duck, as I think geniuses are. You know, it’s not helpful, but he is his own person.”

• Attorney General Pam Bondi’s botched Epstein files rollout: “I think she completely whiffed … She gave them binders full of nothingness. And then she said that the witness list, or the client list, was on her desk. There is no client list, and it sure as hell wasn’t on her desk.”

• Trump’s political persecutions: “I don’t think he’s on a retribution tour.” When asked about the mortgage fraud allegations against New York Attorney General Letitia James: “Well, that might be the one retribution.”

• White House budget chief Director Russ Vought: “A right-wing absolute zealot.”

Why would Wiles say all that? Did she realize she was on the record?

• Trumpworld was stunned by the articles — and so was Wiles, apparently. She described the reporting as a “disingenuously framed hit piece... done to paint an overwhelmingly chaotic and negative narrative.” But the journalist, Chris Whipple, is a respected historian known for profiling White House chiefs of staff. It also appears that he stood on business like a pro, and carefully locked down his reporting.

• Consider this New York Times excerpt about the fallout: “In the interview, Wiles took issue with the quote about [Musk’s] drug use. ‘That’s ridiculous, I wouldn’t have said it and I wouldn’t know,’” the outlet writes. “But Whipple played a tape for The Times in which she could be heard saying it.” The White House, hilariously, made every cabinet member defend Wiles on social media.

• Some journalists have a theory of the case: In politics, high-level officials often chat with reporters casually. They assume the reporters won’t publish their most bonkers, scandal-inducing comments with their names attached — out of fear that it’ll ruin the relationship. Wiles may have assumed Whipple wouldn’t risk losing such access by publishing a bombshell story. But you know what they say about assuming.…

This whole situation is giving Cousin Greg from “Succession” vibes, when he nervously meets with Logan’s biographer. “You can’t say I said anything!” Greg pleads. “That’s unfair!”

WHAT ELSE? 👀

Unemployment rose to 4.6 percent last month, according to delayed federal data. That’s the highest it’s been in four years. But remember, this is still Joe Biden’s economy! Duh.

Former White House official Katie Miller teased the release of a new episode of her podcast… with FBI Director Kash Patel and his 27-year-old girlfriend. The criticism came harsh and swift: “Hey no rush on solving the at large killer in my hometown,” one commenter replied, referencing the FBI’s still-fruitless hunt for the Brown University shooter.

Defense Secretary Pete Hegeth said that he won’t release video of the September strikes against alleged drug boats, which killed two survivors who were clinging to wreckage. “Of course we’re not going to release a top secret full unedited of that to the general public,” Hegseth told reporters. This comes a day after the U.S. said that it killed eight more people on alleged drug boats in the Pacific.

Do you dare suspect the new White House imperial ballroom isn’t of the utmost importance? Think again. The construction is a matter of national security, according to court filings by the Department of Justice. The big stupid dance hall is now expected to cost $300 million and be completed by the summer of 2028, so Trump will barely even get to use it, lol.

Even far-right antisemitic incel Nick Fuentes is bashing Trump’s heinous post mocking the murder of beloved director Rob Reiner. “This is ugly rhetoric … it is actually evil,” Fuentes said. “No one should be making fun of [the killing]. It’s not funny. Who could, honest to god, look at that and laugh?”

LIGHT AT THE END… ☀️

The statue of a Black teen who fought segregation replaced one of a Confederate general in the Capitol today. Barbara Rose Johns led a Virginia high school walkout in 1951 against segregation, in a flashpoint that eventually became part of the Supreme Court’s landmark Brown v. Board of Education decision.

Everyone loves a good true crime mystery: The family of the late Zappos CEO declared that the billionaire’s will, which surfaced last year after a man claimed that it was in his grandfather’s possession, is fake. The family’s attorneys hired counterfeit documents and linguistics experts to crack the case. I’d definitely watch a Netflix documentary about this.

The Associated Press put together a gallery of stunning photos from across Africa throughout 2025. While some pictures capture the conflicts raging on the continent, many show a side that’s rarely covered in media: Huge weddings, smiling children riding a rollercoaster, a model applying makeup before a youth leadership contest, a gleeful woman reciting prayer to mark Prophet Muhammad’s birthday.

Chef Donell Stallworth saved the life of Charlie Hicks, a 78-year-old Air Force veteran who ate at his Florida restaurant nearly every day for a decade. After Hicks didn’t eat at Shrimp Basket for a few days, Stallworth rushed to his house and discovered that Hicks had suffered a fall and needed help. Now, Hicks is healthy and lives in an apartment next to the restaurant — and he was given free gumbo for life.

Young adults in the dating scene are so sick of “the apps” that they’re letting their moms, dads, and siblings control their profiles. One family even gathers around the TV after Sunday dinner, swiping through the daughter’s Bumble profile: The mom is “picking guys who are wearing Gucci and more designer, put-together apparel. And I’m like, okay, but how are they gonna do on a hike?” said the daughter, whose profile is being scrutinized.