Patriot,

Recently, MAGA reached out to you to confirm whether you wanted to increase or decrease the number of political email messages you receive on a daily basis. 

At 8:21am today, local time, you elected to receive an increase in political email messages.

Based on our records, we thought that was strange. We’re not convinced that this account activity was made by you.

We consider you to be amongst our top MAGA Patriots, so we want to make sure we’re treating you with the respect and privacy you deserve.

Please Patriot, we need to hear from you before midnight tonight. 

If you decide to mark your file as “reduced contact”, believe us when we say we will not be offended. On the contrary, we will appreciate your honesty.

However, if we do not hear from you at all before midnight tonight, we will assume you’ve grown resentful towards us, and our system will automatically mark you as a “flipped Democrat”. 

Would you like to change your messaging preferences to “reduced contact”?