In the Jewish tradition, gratitude is not only a feeling. It is a response to a sacred question. That question is “Ayeka?” “Where are you?” It is the first question God poses to humanity in the Garden of Eden, spoken into a moment when everything has already gone wrong. Adam is hiding. The relationship is […]

Conservatism may be the superior political ideology, but don’t beat yourself up, liberals. There’s still plenty to be thankful for this year. Here are just a few examples: Trump will probably die before he’s 100, so he can only be president for like 20 more years: No one lives forever. Trump got totally owned by […]

U.S. — Authorities issued a public service announcement in time for the holiday season, reminding parents that if they leave their children home alone, they should ensure that they have access to plenty of paint cans, a blowtorch, and a cardboard cutout of Michael Jordan. In a pinch, a cardboard cutout of Shaquille O’Neal would […]

People often look up to me as someone with consummate social skills — a natural diplomat, whose cosmopolitan breeding, aristocratic manners, and stolidly Stoic temperament allow me to defuse confrontations over issues where honest people feel strongly, especially over their foolish and ignorant ideas on religion and politics. On countless social occasions, from the Gothic […]

MOULTONBOROUGH, NH — To make the most of the Thanksgiving holiday, the Richardson family reportedly instituted helpful debate rules allowing for 2-minute speeches followed by a 1-minute rebuttal. “We have to have order, people,” Henry Richardson said. “No shouting over people, or you’re not getting any desert.” According to sources, pre-planned debate topics for the […]