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Here's today's roundup. | Brigitte Macron to Provide “Photographic Evidence” that Proves She’s a Woman |
You may recall that the first couple of France is suing Candace Owens for repeatedly claiming that Brigitte Macron is secretly a man. Both parties are unrelenting in their insistence that they’re right, with Owens saying she would "stake [her] entire professional reputation” on Brigitte having a penis, and the Macrons dismissing her belief as “demonstrably false.”
We hate to put this image in your head, but there is a way to prove unequivocally which side is aligned with the truth. The French first lady is reportedly ready to embrace it, preparing to present "photographic and scientific evidence" in court to prove that she is a woman.
The Macrons filed their suit in Delaware, meaning it’s possible that members of its jury could be reading this newsletter. If you’re one of them, we highly recommend calling in sick the day Brigitte presents this “evidence.” You’ll thank yourself later. Read more. |
JASMINE CROCKETT: "Just Because Someone Has Committed a Crime, it Doesn't Make Them a Criminal" |
Democrat intellectual thought leader Jasmine Crockett blessed America with her latest groundbreaking insight on Wednesday, declaring that committing a crime does not make a person a criminal.
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“I do want people to know that just because someone has committed a crime, it doesn’t make them a criminal,” the continually entertaining congresswoman said. “That is completely different. Being a criminal is more so about your mindset.”
Got that? Being a criminal is just about your mindset. Sure, you could purposely run over an elderly grandmother with your pickup truck, but you’d only be a criminal if you felt like you’d done something wrong.
Crockett’s theory begs a few obvious questions. If someone robs a convenience store, are they not necessarily a burglar? What about if they pump drug money through a small business? Is that only money laundering if their mind says it is? And how about lesser violations, like speeding tickets? If a cop pulled us over for driving 45 in a 30, could we get the ticket waived by telling the judge we were operating with a 28-mile-per-hour mindset? If so, America’s criminal justice system will never be the same. Read more.
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House Dems Fear They’re “Being Totally Set Up” by Charlie Kirk Resolution |
House Democrats are reportedly deeply anxious that the GOP’s resolution to honor Charlie Kirk could make their party look terrible.
"People are worried that we're being totally set up," an unnamed liberal lawmaker said on Thursday. The concern is that "anything short of a unanimous vote for the resolution could be a messaging coup for Republicans."
The anonymous legislator is undoubtedly correct that voting against honoring the gunned-down father of two would be a pretty bad look for Democrats, especially considering Republicans unanimously supported a June resolution condemning the killings of Democratic state lawmakers in Minnesota. The good news is that an easy solution to their problem exists: just vote yes. The man got shot. This shouldn’t be hard. Read more. |
REPORT: Gen Z Adults Attend Church More Than Any Other Generation
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Charlie Kirk often celebrated America’s spiritual revival. He was thrilled to see increasing numbers of citizens turning to Christ and bucking the West’s trend of embracing a Godless society.
A new report shows the drastic extent of this transformation. Gen Z adults are attending church more frequently than any other generation, with people born between 1997 and 2007 visiting houses of worship an average of 23 times per year, according to research from the Barna Group. The data also shows that Millennials, Gen X, and Boomers head to church roughly 22, 19, and 17 times annually, respectively.
“The fact that young people are showing up more frequently than before is not a typical trend,” Barna’s VP of research said in a statement. “This data represents good news for church leaders and adds to the picture that spiritual renewal is shaping Gen Z and Millennials today.”
We’re sure this development would bring Charlie joy. Read more. |
Charlie Kirk Tribute Special to Replace Jimmy Kimmel Live |
Jimmy Kimmel’s ABC time slot will be worth watching for the first time in decades tonight.
Network affiliate conglomerate Sinclair has announced plans to air a Charlie Kirk tribute special during the hour that Kimmel formerly occupied. The program will run at 11:35 p.m. Eastern Time.
In case you missed it, ABC suspended Kimmel’s late-night show indefinitely on Wednesday after he mindlessly claimed that Charlie’s assassin was a MAGA Republican.
“The MAGA Gang [is] desperately trying to characterize this kid who murdered Charlie Kirk as anything other than one of them,” he said with a straight face.
Does he also think Martin Luther King’s killer was an anti-segregationist? Or that Brutus killed Caesar because he was happy with the emperor’s rule? Read more.
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Turning Point USA Names Erika Kirk as New CEO |
Many people have expressed concern about the possibility of Turning Point USA being hijacked by “conservatives” who are not ideologically aligned with Charlie Kirk. We’re happy to report that there is nothing to worry about.
TPUSA’s remaining leadership announced the unanimous election of Charlie's widow, Erica, as the organization’s new CEO and chair of the board on Thursday. The group said that “Charlie expressed to multiple executives that this is what he wanted in the event of his death.”
Mrs. Kirk recently appeared on her husband’s show. He described her as far more conservative than him, saying, “It’s not even close. I am a moderate compared to Erika.”
Like neocons who spent years obsessing over regime change in Libya, Syria, and Iraq, Charlie’s killer clearly lacked the foresight to imagine what would happen after he committed his dastardly act. Whoops. Read more. |
Accused Kirk Assassin Longed for “Hot Gay Sex” |
You’ve probably never heard of “Furry Shades of Gay.” We don’t blame you. It’s a cartoon porn video game with a mix of “hot gay sex and slapstick humor.” Accused Charlie Kirk assassin Tyler Robinson reportedly loves it.
The 22-year-old murder suspect was fixated on the program, according to the Daily Mail, with a particular interest in “gay porn involving humanoid animal characters called 'furries.’” He also followed artists who drew explicit cartoons associated with pedophilia.
“Furry Shades of Gay is a game about love, queer relationships, hot gay sex and slapstick humor,” its listing on gaming platform Steam states. “Win match-3 challenges, and get ready for 24 hot animated VOICED sex scenes!”
Robinson once authored a comment that read, “he beats me when mom goes on her work trips.” We’re not clear on whether that was meant as kinky, but we wouldn’t be surprised.
In related news, the apparent “Furry Shades of Gay” sommelier reportedly begged police for a “peaceful, gentle” surrender before his arrest. So he likes violent murder and violent gay sex, but gentle incarcerations. Got it. Read more. |
U.S. Could Return to Afghanistan |
Joe Biden’s Afghanistan withdrawal was a disaster, but it did achieve the long-overdue mission of getting America out of the chaotic Middle Eastern country. Four years later, Washington appears to be plotting a return.
Donald Trump announced that his administration is trying to get the former U.S. Bagram Airfield in Afghanistan "back" from the Taliban on Thursday, expressing his urge to reclaim the facility because “it's an hour away from where China makes its nuclear weapons.” He also said the Taliban are interested in pursuing his vision because “they need things from us,” but did not elaborate on what those needs are.
Taliban leadership is reportedly interested in normalizing relations with the U.S. amid their struggles to gain international legitimacy since regaining control of Afghanistan. America, the UK, Canada, Germany, and France all do not recognize them as a valid governing body.
The first Trump administration originally negotiated the removal of all U.S. forces by mid-year 2021. Read more. |
IN CASE YOU MISSED IT: Is Kamala Harris an Anti-Gay Bigot? |
A recently released excerpt from Kamala Harris’s forthcoming book reveals that she bypassed Pete Buttigieg as her 2024 running mate because he claims to be gay.
Mayor Pete “would have been an ideal partner — if I were a straight white man,” the former vice president wrote.
The irony of Harris purportedly using Buttigieg’s identity to deny him an opportunity that she received because of her identity is hilariously profound. So is the obvious truth that the real reason she shot him down is because she didn’t want a running mate who’s smarter than her. The notion that voters are as obsessed with irrelevant candidate traits like sex, race, and sexuality as Democrat leaders is also worth acknowledging. What is it going to take for them to realize the country just wants sound policies?
Lastly, we’d be remiss not to mention that we are less than convinced that Pete is actually gay. Our LGBT sources insist the whole thing is a charade. But Kamala is clearly convinced. Read more. |
STUDY: Chimpanzees Consume Equivalent of Two Alcoholic Drinks Per Day |
Have you ever seen a drunk ape? They may be more common than we knew.
A new Science Advances journal study found that chimpanzees eating fermented fruit in their native habitats consume the equivalent of nearly two alcoholic drinks per day. Researchers reached their conclusion after analyzing 21 species of fruit regularly eaten by chimps in Uganda and the Ivory Coast.
Chimpanzees consume roughly 14 grams of pure ethanol on a daily basis, equivalent to one standard American beverage, according to a post-study news release. When adjusted for body mass, the total increases to nearly twofold. Researchers are unclear on whether the primates deliberately seek out fruits with higher ethanol levels, but come on. Of course they do. Read more. |
It’s hard to overstate the absurdity of this Ted Cruz tweet.
The Texas Tel Aviv senator accused this network and its nonexistent “cronies” of claiming that Charlie Kirk thought “Israel is terrible & the problem in America is all the damn Jews,” while subtweeting a video from Tuesday’s Tucker Carlson Show in which we said nothing remotely close. What the broadcast actually reported was the truth that Charlie saw the Israeli prime minister as a destructive force, and resented him for using the United States to prosecute his wars on his country’s behalf. There is nothing antisemitic about pointing that out; it is merely a criticism of one man and his government. Netanyahu doesn’t represent all Jews any more than Joe Biden represents all Christians.
Ted Cruz may act like a dumb man, but he isn’t one. As a lawyer with multiple Ivy League degrees, he is smart enough to know that he is lying about our show. There is not a single time when we’ve said anything about “all the damn Jews,” nor have we torn into the entity of Israel beyond critiquing its current government. Last we checked, that is allowed.
The natural question here is, “Why would Tel Aviv Ted be so dishonest?” Debaters who know they can’t win in the marketplace of free ideas resort to personal attacks all the time, but this slander is so absurd that it requires further explanation. No good-faith actor would tell a lie this extreme. Something beyond ideology is driving him. It’s easy to figure out what.
It’s the money.
Take a look at this page showing the sums of campaign contributions Texas congressmembers have received from the American Israel Public Affairs Committee. There’s no fatter cat than Cruz. He’s raked in nearly $2 million. Why? Does anyone seriously believe the Israel lobby is simply shelling out its cash out of the goodness of its heart because it earnestly believes Ted Cruz is the best man to represent the good people of Texas? Of course not. They’re paying him because they want him to advance Israel’s interests, and like any good boy would, he’s bending over backwards to obey. That’s why he spreads such shameless falsehoods about TCN. His entire shtick is a corrupt charade.
Unfortunately, this is a common dynamic in Washington. Money, not principle, drives most politicians. Realizing this harsh reality can be radicalizing – a total worldview changer. How much else of what happens in the halls of power is dictated by donors instead of the people? We’re sorry to report that it’s nearly everything.
Why do you think lawmakers allow Big Pharma to rob Americans blind? How come Congress keeps jacking up the Pentagon’s budget even though it can’t pass an audit? Isn’t it strange that our tax code still has a carried-interest loophole? And why does the government refuse to rein in Artificial Intelligence?
There are no principled answers to any of those questions. They don’t exist because the policies are indefensible. Corruption is the only explanation. Here’s our best shot at an optimistic outlook:
The only way for things to change is if Americans get so fed up that they revolt at the ballot boxes. Refuse to back any candidate who leeches off this grotesque system. Only support those committed to serving all voters, not just those with hefty checkbooks. He may not realize it, but Cruz’s flamboyant worship of his monied masters could open the public’s eyes to just how broken our “representative democracy” really is. And that could drive positive change. We hope it does.
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September 19, 1995: The Unabomber’s manifesto goes public. Multiple newspapers published the previously unidentified terrorist’s writings in the hopes that a reader would recognize their language and help expose the author. David Kaczynski did just that, linking the manifesto’s style to his older brother Ted, whom police arrested the following year. Ted’s capture concluded the then-longest and most expensive FBI investigation in history. He pleaded guilty to three counts of first-degree murder in 1998 and died in prison in 2023. |
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