John,
Ten years ago today, I was sitting in the Supreme Court fighting for my husband, John, and for queer couples like us across the nation.
Before sharing our story, I ask that you chip in to Equality Virginia and Equality Ohio to help protect our freedoms.
After ALS stole almost all of his physical abilities, I became John’s caretaker. After all, that’s what you do when you love someone. We began at-home hospice care out of concern over how John would be treated as an out gay man in a hospice facility. Even if we had been married, would they recognize me as his spouse in a healthcare setting?
We had wanted to get married since the mid-1990s, but it became especially important to us as he neared the end of his life. Because marriage equality was not legal in Ohio, we flew to Maryland within two weeks of the Windsor decision striking down the federal Defense of Marriage Act. The day I took John’s hand in mine and we got married on the tarmac of a Maryland airport, was the happiest day of our life together.
When we discovered the State of Ohio would refuse to list John as married or recognize me as John’s surviving spouse on his death certificate at the time he died, we started the fight that eventually became the Supreme Court case Obergefell v. Hodges. Although John died before our historic win, seeing how marriage equality has changed so many lives reminds me of him daily.
Sadly, the right to marriage we fought for is under attack, again.
Ten years later, anti-equality forces are attacking our rights like never before. In fact, they’re passing state laws and resolutions, trying to get the Supreme Court to overturn marriage equality.
Please split a donation between Equality Virginia and Equality Ohio to make sure we can keep fighting back.
You don’t have to take it from me. Just this year, the Idaho House passed a resolution urging the U.S. Supreme Court to reconsider the Obergefell decision. Just a few months ago, the North Dakota House passed a similar bill. Supreme Court justices have also made it clear they want to overturn Obergefell and other decisions.
Even worse are the attacks on the transgender community, including in my home of Ohio, where transgender youth are subject to laws that have torn their healthcare away, removed their right to play sports or use the correct restroom at school and subjected them to a forced outing law, even when doing so puts them at risk of abuse at home.
I was lucky to love John, and our willingness to fight for each other – and our relationship – helped make the world a better place. I couldn’t have done it without more than thirty other plaintiffs and the attorneys who were part of Obergefell v. Hodges. It was a group effort, and that’s why we need your help today.
Will you split a donation between Equality Virginia and Equality Ohio to stand with me and defend LGBTQ+ Equality?
We won because our community refused anything less than equality. We refused to live in a world where birth and death certificates could ignore our lawful marriages. We refused to live in a world where we were unable to say “I do” to the person we love.
Today, we refuse to live in a world where birth certificates are weaponized to deny our gender identity. We refuse to live in a world where a loving parent cannot make healthcare decisions for their child. It’s time for us to demand equality and justice again.
We know what life was like before, and we are NOT going back.
This time, I hope you’ll join me and commit to protecting our right to not only love, but to exist.
Love first, and always,
Jim
