"Welcome to Costco, I love you"
͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­͏     ­
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Costco is not a government agency / Getting infested for dollars / Fool-proof plan to prove Bigfoot exists

"Welcome to Costco, I love you"

Keith Conrad
Jun 9
 
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TSA Deems Costco Membership Cards Invalid for Domestic Air Travel

Listen, if it’ll get me an entire pallet of beef jerky, why shouldn’t it work as a form of identification?

It Might Be Biggest Ever Payout Over Bed Bugs

They got $2 million. Would you take the relatively temporary inconvenience of bed bugs if you were going to get a $2 million check? Itch you way to the bank


More Stories Below, but first some new content in the News Sidequest Podcast Universe…


Auditory Anthology

SCI-FI SHORT STORIES - NARRATED BY DARREN MARLAR & PRODUCED BY KEITH CONRAD
In this episode we’re sharing the story "Blowups Happen", written in 1940 by Robert Heinlein. "Blowups Happen" describes the tensions among the staff of a nuclear reactor. Heinlein's concept of a nuclear reactor was one of a barely contained explosion, which as you might imagine can lead to some stress.

Blowups Happen by Robert Heinlein

Keith Conrad / Darren Marlar

Episode

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Become a paid subscriber to listen to all of our episodes completely ad-free! You’ll also get access to a deeper dive on the stories we share and the authors!

Buddy Rich, Chuck Berry, and the Tightest Jeans in the Business: A Conversation with Mike Arturi

AS I WAS SAYING WITH BIG JOHN HOWELL
John reconnects with his longtime friend, drummer and music educator Mike Arturi. Mike shares some incredible stories from a life on stage—including gigs with Badfinger, encounters with rock royalty like Paul McCartney and John Lennon, and his ongoing work with The Lovin' Spoonful.

Buddy Rich, Chuck Berry, and the Tightest Jeans in the Business: A Conversation with Mike Arturi

Big John Howell

Episode

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Blocking Jurko, Smoking Cubans, and Belichick’s Mermaid Muse

THE CHICAGO SMOKEHOUSE WITH JOHN HOWELL AND RICK TELANDER
John Howell and Rick Telander return to their favorite cigar-scented studio to talk about everything except politics. The conversation swirls from charity softball heroics and Beatles trivia to a truly baffling public image makeover by one of football’s most famously stone-faced coaches.

Blocking Jurko, Smoking Cubans, and Belichick’s Mermaid Muse

John Howell / Rick Telander

Episode

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Also Worth A Look…

  • Reported Bigfoot sighting prompts cannabis dispensary to offer discount for photographic proof - If this doesn’t coax out some solid evidence, I think we can go ahead and put the issue to bed

  • Cops: Teen Going 132MPH Blames Job Interview - Are you hiring that guy?

  • Man made a false bomb threat so he wouldn't miss a flight to LA, FBI says - I have a hard time wrapping my noggin around the fact that people think they’ll actually get away with doing something like that

  • German cathedral offers ‘sincere regret’ for chicken dance - This is a good start, but I won’t be happy until everyone who has ever done the chicken dance apologizes

  • Swiss government forbids use of donkeys to protect against wolf attacks - If you’re worried about alligator attacks though, you’re fine

  • Woman Attends Funerals for Two Years Hoping to Catch Undertaker’s Eye - I feel like that’s gotta be the most disturbing meet cute in human history

  • Drinking sugar may be worse than eating it, study finds - Let’s just face it, anything you enjoy is probably slowly killing you

  • Village referendum change name from ShitHole to NearForest failed by 2 votes - The people have spoken

  • Massachusetts dad gives daughter lottery ticket worth $2M - Someone’s getting a really good Father’s Day gift

  • Man Could Become First to Solo Row 2,000 Miles Around Great Britain–in Under 60 Days - He had “Row Row Row Your Boat” stuck in his head the entire time

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© 2025 Keith Conrad
25 Northwest Point Blvd Suite 400 Elk Grove Village, IL 60007
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