For the past fourteen years, I’ve watched my best friend and brother fall victim to the symptoms, prejudices and social injustices that come with the territory of living with a severe mental illness. The illness, a delusion disorder, slowly robbed him of his life and his future. In a lot of ways I found myself grieving a person who was very much still alive. There were so many parts of him I knew wouldn’t be the same again. However, there was so much more about him to learn, love, and support; if, only, we were given an opportunity to do so.
He was silly and funny, highly intelligent (still is), polished, and most importantly kind. Parents, friends, and teachers admired him. He was the first one that would stick up for a kid getting bullied, had the biggest and most accepting heart, and lifted everyone up around him.
There is a lot of him that is still very much the same; his intelligence, knowledge, kindness, and incredible heart. But, slowly, the illness became more prevalent. It was years of small behavioral changes; a deep and unwavering relationship to God, a gradual decline in hygiene, depressive moods, withdrawal and isolation, and fixed false beliefs on particular subject matters. Despite all of the negative impacts of the illness, he accomplished so much. He was very athletic and highly intelligent. He continued to perform at the highest of levels despite the illness. He was a collegiate athlete and graduated in four years with both an undergraduate and master’s degree.
What’s sneaky about mental illness is that in some ways a person’s judgment and cognitive thoughts are negatively impacted and in other ways they can still very much function ‘normally’. High-functioning individuals with a mental illness are those hardest to treat as doctors, family members, and even themselves find it hard to pinpoint symptoms and changes. These individuals also tend to fall through the cracks of our systems. They are too smart and able for conservatorship or guardianship and are able to hold a job most of the time. However, that does not mean that they are well, mentally sound, or are smart and capable to fix themselves.
To read the rest of this personally speaking blog visit our website.
