For decades, self-advocates with intellectual and developmental disabilities (IDD) have pointed out that behavior is communication, and all behavior happens for a reason. When people with IDD want help changing our behavior — or more often, when other people want to change our behavior — we sometimes get services called “behavior supports.” What people call “behavior supports” covers a wide variety of services, and not all of these services are truly helpful to people with IDD. How can we move away from services that try to change people’s behavior without understanding what people are thinking and feeling? What would it take to create behavior support services that help us live self-determined lives in the community?