Adult life is a complex game of resource management. After all, there’s only so much time, energy, and focus to go around. How much do we spend on work? Leisure? Relationships? Ourselves? The math becomes all the more complicated when you become a parent. And the speed with which stresses can pile on can strain resources and easily leave any busy mom or dad feeling depleted and just over parenting.

While tough to admit, such feelings are quite common. And if they linger and feel unshakable, you might be experiencing what some researchers call parental burnout. Burnout can feel impossible to defeat — and for men in particular it’s often suffered quietly. However, there’s a trusted formula for how to reduce burnout and burnout risk: decrease stress and increase resources. This is how parents can do just that.