This week, I address why you should be more afraid of not facing a problem rather than dealing with the difficulty of solving it.
** Mondays of Meaning
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November 6th 2023 | Dr. Jordan B. Peterson
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Hello,
In this week’s edition, I address why you should be more afraid of not facing a problem rather than dealing with the difficulty of solving it. Then, the Honourable Tony Abbott joins me to discuss Australia’s economy, culture, and role on the world stage. From the archives, I discuss how to gain clarity when facing tragedies in life.
Advice
Move The Dragon Guarding The Path In Front Of You
One thing you see when you talk to people who are trying to solve problems is that they are afraid to face the problem, so then their anxiety is working against them. You can think about it as antagonistic to rationality. But then I could say, “Well, why don’t you think for a while about what your life would be like if you did not face this problem?”
If you have a problem and you really think through what the consequences are going to be in three to five years of not facing it, then you are going to get more afraid of not facing it than facing it. That is great because then, instead of having a dragon guarding the path in front of you — instead of your anxiety standing in front of you — you have a dragon chasing you down the path from behind.
That is a lot more useful. That is just a minimal example of the utility of getting your emotions and your thoughts aligned the same way.
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My clinical experience, I would say, and my life experience, taught me that you could divide your life, in some sense, into thirds. One-third of that is intimate relationship. We will say marriage. One-third of that is family, and one-third of that is career. That’s a rough break — a rough categorization — but it is not a bad place to start with regard to rule of thumb. Well, why get married? People want a partner. Half the dialogue that you hear between people, especially if they are single, is related to their desire to have a partner. Half the dialogue you hear from people who are in a relationship is how to deal with problems in their relationship. But it is a very rare person who does not need and want an intimate relationship.
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** This Week On The Podcast
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This Is Why You’re Hopeless And Miserable | The Honourable Tony Abbott | EP 393
This week on the podcast, I talk with Australian journalist and former prime minister, the Honourable Tony Abbott. We discuss Australia’s role on the world stage, the problem facing their economy and culture, why new religions propagate the abdication of faith, and the looming threat of war as China destabilizes while Putin moves forward.
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** From The Archives
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How To Deal With Sadness And Chaos In Your Life
In this video, I read a question from a man who was diagnosed with cancer months after finding out he and his wife might not be able to have children. He asks how to combat depression, and rather than give casual advice, I distinguish between depression and tragedies of life.
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Thank you for reading,
Dr. Jordan B. Peterson
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