My coming out story
LGBTQ+ Victory Institute logo

John,

I came out of the closet the year I first ran for office. At the time, my then-mentor told me she loved me, but that unfortunately I couldn’t run for office. The thought of an out gay legislator deep in the working-class suburbs was unheard of at the time.

This was almost twenty-five years ago. But today is National Coming Out Day, a day we celebrate the joy of coming out – and acknowledge how unfortunately common stories like mine still are. LGBTQ+ elected officials like myself are still urged to hide who we are to appeal to voters. But in my case – as you’ll read – voters and supporters are more accepting than we assume.

I had started coming out to my family and close friends, but not broadly or publicly. I struggled with how to best share the information in public without making a big deal out of it. Working with a communications consultant, we decided I wouldn’t make an “announcement,” but instead would just reference it casually as if I assumed everyone already knew.

I gave a carefully scripted speech announcing my candidacy to my local party organization. I spoke about how we live in a country that holds the promise of freedom and opportunity for all, but that the promise had not yet been fulfilled. I then said; “Women still make 80 cents on the dollar. Those of us who are gay or lesbian can be fired from our job because of who we are....” When I said “those of us” I gestured subtly toward myself.

I remember an elderly couple in the front row turned and looked at each other in shock when I said that.

Afterwards, most people just assumed they were the only ones who didn’t know. I won my race and made history as the first out LGBTQ+ legislator outside the City of Seattle in the history of the State of Washington.

When I think about that day, 25 years ago, I think about how far we’ve moved forward – that for so many, coming out and running as an out candidate isn’t something to hide. I’m heartened to know there are organizations like Victory Institute, who train LGBTQ+ candidates to run as out and proud individuals – and who help them serve openly while in office. If you can join me in supporting this essential work by donating, I appreciate it.

Warmly,

Dave Upthegrove
King County Council, District 5, WA

 
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LGBTQ+ Victory Institute is a global organization dedicated to elevating out LGBTQ+ leaders who can further equality at all levels of government. Through our global and domestic trainings, professional development programs and yearly conferences, Victory Institute prepares hundreds of out individuals to launch an influential careers in politics, government, business and advocacy. Many of our trainees join the more than 1,000 out LGBTQ+ elected and appointed officials now serving around the world. You can power our work and the next Rainbow Wave with a donation today!

 
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