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How to Play to Your Strengths - Harvard Business Review   

It’s only natural to struggle with receiving negative feedback. In this article, the authors present a tool to help you understand and leverage your strengths, offering a unique feedback experience that counterbalances negative input. This exercise, dubbed the Reflected Best Self (RBS), allows you to tap into talents you may not have been aware of and increase your career potential. To begin, start gathering input from family, friends, colleagues, and teachers around what they see as your key strengths. Next, search for common themes in the feedback to develop a clearer picture of these strengths. Next, write a description of yourself that summarizes and distills the accumulated information. Finally, redesign your understanding of your ideal job description to build on what you’ve discovered you’re best at. Once you’re more aware of your best self, you can shape the roles you choose to take on — both today and in the next phases of your career.

Most feedback accentuates the negative. During formal employee evaluations, discussions invariably focus on “opportunities for improvement,” even if the overall evaluation is laudatory. Informally, the sting of criticism lasts longer than the balm of praise. Multiple studies have shown that people pay keen attention to negative information. For example, when asked to recall important emotional events, people remember four negative memories for every positive one. No wonder most executives give and receive performance reviews with all the enthusiasm of a child on the way to the dentist.

Traditional, corrective feedback has its place, of course; every organization must filter out failing employees and ensure that everyone performs at an expected level of competence. Unfortunately, feedback that ferrets out flaws can lead otherwise talented managers to overinvest in shoring up or papering over their perceived weaknesses, or forcing themselves onto an ill-fitting template. Ironically, such a focus on problem areas prevents companies from reaping the best performance from its people. After all, it’s a rare baseball player who is equally good at every position. Why should a natural third baseman labor to develop his skills as a right fielder?

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