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🌏🏆I’ve been trying to gather my thoughts on the 2023 World Cup for days now. First I had to unmuddle my head from the erratic sleep pattern I inflicted upon myself in order to be in attendance: on my couch from 1 am to 5 am, bleary-eyed but 100 percent in on watching what was, imo, one of the most high-level, competitive tournaments ever. Second, & most challengingly, has been waiting to see what happens with all the Trickle Down Dickenomics that somehow still pervades & pursues non-male athletes.
⚽️⚽️What The!? … You’d think the Women’s World Cup, of all places, would not have been a media storm of D!ck Pics. But, here we are. Goddess help me, when will these men stop acting like vegetarians just haven’t found the right sausage. Now, I’m not here to say men shouldn’t be allowed to have leadership roles in women’s sports, but I am saying that like a bad TV show that’s out of touch with its viewers, it’s absolutely acceptable for that tired old show to be canceled in order to make way for a fresh, new hit. Oh no! I’ve said that dreaded word, cancel, so let’s just talk about that for a second — the phrase cancel culture* like so many things, is a phrase co-opted by the doers of bad things to turn the attention away from the actual bad things they are doing by gaslighting everyone around them into the argumentative distraction we know as modern-day Republican politics rather than working toward the actual accountability culture that was the ask in the first place. Now, back to our regularly scheduled program.
⬅️It’s high time our news apps let us Swipe Left on these unattractive & reprehensible male behaviors that keep getting All The Damn Minutes. Folx, there were so many amazing moments that happened on the pitch of the World Cup 2023 that have been overshadowed by a systemically enshrined double-headed monster: FOX sports messaging and the misogynistic men who control the fates of women in sport.
👐🏼Oh, the glory was on full display for all of us to see, and it was absolutely breathtaking. Instead we had to watch the knee-jerk reactions of (🍆🌄 #1) Alexi Lalas and Carli Lloyd whose hatred for their own team was palpable. While players from around the world showed us the way forward for a divided world, of the ills we could solved if only we’d been able to focus on what grace under fire looks like, what heroic sportspersonship does to the human heart — we’d be able to Grinch-ending our way out of this blubbering backlash from people who want the world to be a 1950s TV show. Because that’s the thing about sport. It’s always been about so much more than a game — it’s always been about overcoming obstacles & adversity. It has always been about shedding the burdens of race, class, gender, sexuality.
🦊📰But, we have a major American media problem. FOX analysts, even in sports, are tainting the field. Their World Cup commentators spent more time blaming & shaming the USWNT, taking to their socials and rightwing podcasts to reinforce (🍆🌄 #2) The Atrocious Orange’s tweet that “WOKE EQUALS FAILURE.” The demons of democracy want No Ideologies Allowed unless it’s a bible verse on a jersey or a cross painted on a face — but asking for equal pay and civil rights is a big fat no. Whatever, minions of Multiple Indictment man. The pendulum will swing back so hard it will knock you on your ass.
🥸The dark joy coming from Alexi Lalas & Carli Lloyd was so America First & MAGA-tinged that I had to hit mute. And while it’s standard FOX play, isn’t it unpatriotic to hate the R, W, & B. Lalas belched & bemoaned, like a true-to-form Fox analyst, his unending disdain for the USWNT. Lalas, an early DeSantis endorser, took to Twitter after the first game to say “Politics, causes, stances, & behavior have made this team unlikeable to a portion of America.” Uh, which portion is that Alexi? The portion you’re helping make sports about politics, causes, stances & behavior? Folx, will we ever rid ourselves of these power-hungry, ego-maniacal men who can’t critique a job performance of a woman or queer athlete without resorting to hateful & degrading rhetoric? It begs the unending question: When will we say no freaking more? And when will women like Carli Lloyd quit enabling this crap? Lloyd, once a darling of the USWNT, used her first commentary gig as a replacement for scoring goals to scoring eyerolls. She blamed the U.S.A. tie with Portugal on the players playing for money rather than playing for the love of the game. Yep, women are just supposed to love what they do without adequate pay. My gawds Carli. I don’t see her out there telling Russell Wilson that his lackluster performance in Denver last year was because the money got in the way of his love of the game.
😗And then, there’s that never-ending deeply embedded systemic problem since the beginning of Women where men just keep men-ing it up. A quick search of reliable news outlets will show you that Spain is BY FAR not the only country dealing with sexual harassment or failure to pay issues for its women’s teams, but for today, let’s talk about Spain. Spain, who won their first-ever World Cup, is mired in so much Male Muck that the glow of the gold is being unfairly blocked by The Disgusting Bros. Spanish coach, (🍆🌄 #3) Jorge Vilda, who looks like his middle name is Rohypnol, should have been shitcanned years ago. Which would have kept him from being able to grab a coach’s breast during the World Cup Final! He’s also the MF who did not allow women to lock their hotel doors at night so he could “check on them.” He’s so despised by his players that they actively avoided him during the month-long tournament.
😘Then, there’s (🍆🌄 #4) Luis Rubiales, the president of the Royal Spanish Football Federation (RFEF) whose behavior during the World Cup was gag-inducing. Men, if you’re reading this, please don’t physically pick up grown women. It’s annoying, infantilizing, & you are not their Daddy. Hurricane Rubiales made landfall as a Cat 3 storm. His chosen celebration in the moment of Spain’s victory was to point at the women on the field & then grab his genitals. All while standing next to Queen Letizia of Spain and her 16-year-old daughter. This man lost complete control of himself letting his emotions run around like a rabid dog. He physically lifted players off their feet like rag dolls on the presentation stage, & then, most egregiously, grabbed superstar Spanish player Jenni Hermoso by the head & kissed her on the lips. Without her consent! He later told the players he was going to marry her in Ibiza. CAN YOU IMAGINE. Days later, Rude Rubiales gave a yell-y speech to the RFEF where he thrice cried out, I will not resign , & declared himself the victim of “false feminists.” JFC bro, I mean, the good people of the world do not believe you.
I should be writing about the glory of women’s soccer because there is so much of it. But until FIFA makes real changes to protect & respect women, these are the stories we have to tell too. Luckily, I think it’s just a matter of time before Rubiales and Vilda roll off the field like the deflated balls they are.
Spain will sort itself out. If only I could say the same for FOX.
Kicking balls & scoring goals,
Dc Lozano
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