- Unidentified Fox News blonde (I tried looking it up but truly do not know which one it is) describing…how politics works.

Editor’s note: We’ll be in your inbox tomorrow after the GOP debate to give you the full rundown of all the nonsense

Amid his myriad indictments, disgraced former president Donald Trump is still planning all of the unhinged shit he would try to do if we pass into the ninth circle of hell and he is elected to a second term. 
 

• Trump dined with his top economic advisers (one of whom is a stack of dollar bills wearing Groucho glasses, we assume) at his New Jersey golf club last Wednesday to get the terrible-ideas machine a-churnin’. As the presumptive 2024 GOP nominee, Trump plans to attack Biden on the economy (for the historically-low unemployment? Declining inflation? Rising wages? Who’s to say…) and the big idea all of Trump's economic goons came up with is a plan to enact a “universal baseline tariff” of 10 percent on virtually all goods imported to the United States. 
   

• Trump has referred to this plan to create international economic chaos as a “ring around the U.S. economy.” Economists across the political spectrum say this tariff proposal is extremely dangerous (and highly inflationary). The president of the Peterson Institute for International Economics in Washington, DC, called the idea “lunacy” and “horrifying” (that’s how you know it’s a Donald Trump special). The average tariff the U.S. imposes today is just above three percent, though it’s much higher on goods from certain countries like China, which faces an average import duty of 19 percent. Trump would almost certainly use the promise of tariff exemption as a means of corrupt dealmaking with countries such as, oh I don’t know, Saudi Arabia.  
   

• Not only would such a universal tariff lead to higher prices for consumers during a time when the cost-of-living is already incredibly high for most Americans, it would also likely lead to a global trade war. So, you know, a real win-win. This disastrous idea is expected to not only be a feature but a central tenet of Trump’s 2024 campaign. But that’s only the worst pseudo-populist measure he’s exploring. There are just as deranged, authoritarian policy ideas that span the gamut from deploying the United States military to “fight street crime,” to mass deportations, to purging the federal workforce, and even mandatory stop-and-frisk. Cool! Great stuff as always!

It’s no surprise that Trump is fantasizing about playing dictator president again as the jail cell walls close in on him. 
 

• The Fulton County criminal indictment is clearly getting to the big guy. After posting a $200,000 bond, Trump—in typical fashion—had a complete meltdown on his Truth Social platform. He wrote (or scream-dictated into the phone) “The failed District Attorney of Fulton County (Atlanta), Fani Willis, insisted on a $200,000 Bond from me. I assume, therefore, that she thought I was a “flight” risk - I’d fly far away, maybe to Russia, Russia, Russia, share a gold domed suite with Vladimir, never to be seen or heard from again. Would I be able to take my very “understated” airplane with the gold TRUMP affixed for all to see. Probably not, I’d be much better off flying commercial - I’m sure nobody would recognize me!” I just…what is this guy talking about?
   

• John Eastman, one of Trump’s lawyers who engineered the fake elector scheme, turned himself in to authorities in Atlanta on Tuesday after posting a $100,000 bond on Monday. Eastman was booked at the Fulton County jail and is expected to face arraignment in the coming weeks. When asked outside of the courthouse if he still thinks the 2020 election was stolen, Eastman replied defiantly, “Absolutely. No question.” Good luck with that, my guy! 

Trump will reportedly surrender to Fulton County authorities on Thursday, and remains the likely 2024 Republican nominee for president. What a country.

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Ultraconservative Arkansas was unable to completely ban Advanced Placement African American Studies from its high schools as Florida did, but the state government is making it extremely difficult to teach nonetheless. Of the state’s 259 school districts, only six will offer A.P. African American Studies in the coming school year, and on Monday, Arkansas Education Secretary Jacob Olivia sent letters to superintendents informing them that because of “suspicions” that the class may violate new state laws against “indoctrination” (okay) and critical race theory, teachers will have to submit lesson plans and course materials to the state for review. Olivia wrote, “Given some of the themes included in the pilot, including ‘intersections of identity’ and ‘resistance and resilience,’ the Department is concerned the pilot may not comply with Arkansas law, which does not permit teaching that would indoctrinate students with ideologies…” 
 

The College Board, a nonprofit organization that designs Advanced Placement curricula and exams, shot back, refuting accusations of indoctrination and accusing the state’s DOE of failing to review the publicly-available coursework that has been accessible since February 1, saying that the class, “is not indoctrination…It is a college-level course rooted in the work of 300 scholars and includes facts of African-American experiences in the United States through primary sources that incorporate a combination of history, English, music, and more.” The course was an early target of Gov. Sarah Huckabee Sanders (R-AK), who as recently as last week called it “propaganda leftist agenda, teaching our kids to hate America and hate one another.” Neither the Arkansas DOE nor Sanders have produced any examples of “indoctrination” or substantiate claims that the course is academically shoddy.

A key witness against disgraced former president Donald Trump and his two co-defendants in the Mar-a-Lago documents case recanted previous false testimony after switching his legal defense from a lawyer paid for by Trump’s Save America PAC to a public defender. 

Pakistan’s military has rescued five of eight people stuck in a cable car hanging over 900 feet in the air after a cable snapped over a remote mountainous area near Peshawar. Six of the eight people in the car are children. 

Wildfires have been raging through northeastern Greece for days as a result of a sustained heat wave. On Tuesday, 18 incinerated bodies were found in the remote village of Alexandroupolis. 

A Mississippi police officer who took part in the arrest and jailing of a 10-year-old child for urinating in a parking lot is “no longer employed” and other officers involved will be disciplined according to the city’s police chief. 

Tropical storm Harold made landfall along the southern tip of Texas Tuesday bringing downpours and heavy winds. Flash flooding, minor damage, and power outages are expected throughout the day. 

Demonstrating a commitment to trolling other Republicans that borders on admirable, Trump’s Super PAC created a “VP Presidential Debate” website featuring bobble-head lookalike depictions of each 2024 GOP candidate who will participate in Wednesday’s presidential primary debate.

The coastal town of Lahaina on Hawaii’s island of Maui suffered the most devastation in one of the deadliest wildfires in modern American history. The town’s schools were not spared, leaving 3,000 students and 400 staff members displaced with no actionable path forward in sight. King Kamehameha III Elementary School is in ruins, and three other Lahaina schools are closed until air and water quality tests determine they are safe for use. Even if testing comes back normal, major cleanup will be required in and around all of the schools. Parents who no longer have cars or homes are largely unable to re-enroll their children in surrounding districts, and many families and teachers simply aren’t ready to return at all. FEMA administrator Deanne Criswell said in a Monday briefing on Air Force One en route to Maui that the agency will work with Gov. Josh Green (D-HI) to help bring students back to school.

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Crypto scammer Sam Bankman-Fried’s lawyers said their client cannot be expected to prepare for his trial without proper access to computers, Adderall, and a vegan diet. Bankman-Fried pleaded not guilty to seven charges including wire fraud and multiple counts of conspiracy and is apparently demanding the “college finals week special" ahead of his October 3rd trial. 

The Screen Actors Guild and the Writers Guild of America joined forces with AFL-CIO on Tuesday for a cross-industry National Day of Solidarity. 

Graduate student workers at Duke University won their fight to unionize.