Forward progress is a funny thing. It’s important to aim for in all areas of life but it can be hard to gauge. And it can lead to tricky questions like, am I moving in the right direction? Are we? When it comes to relationships, this is more often true than not, especially when there’s so much fear-inducing messaging about what makes marriages fail rather than what makes them succeed. It’s crucial for couples to grow together, to become more comfortable, to build trust, to gain confidence, but what are some sure signs of growth in a relationship to focus on?

Growth, “means that you and your partner are not only compatible, but also willing to learn, change, and evolve together,” says psychiatrist Dr. Ketan Parmar. In a relationship, he notes, growth can take many forms, such as overcoming challenges, pursuing goals, developing new skills, or exploring new interests. And it’s all good. “When you grow together as a couple, you strengthen your bond, deepen your intimacy, and enhance your happiness.”

So, as it’s always nice to be able to chart your progress and track where you are from where you’ve been, below are some surefire signs your relationship is growing in a positive direction. Take note, and also take a minute to realize just how far you’ve come.