Kids require discipline. Because of course they do. Among other things, teaches them about consequences, self-control, and helps them become emotionally mature adults. Punishment is just one part of discipline but it’s a major part. And some kids take to it better than others. Whether it’s the removal of screen time or a timeout, some kids don’t respond to classic tactics at all. Experiencing a child’s stubborn defiance can be both inspiring and beyond frustrating because, well, discipline is important.

Not all is lost. And one way to address this has nothing to do with punishment itself and everything to do with another crucial aspect of discipline: setting expectations. That is, give your kid a chance to succeed and avoid the need for punishment by letting them know what’s expected of them. Want their toys cleaned up before dinner? Make the timeline clear, and define what “clean” means to you. If this doesn’t work, adjust some more. The point? Try some new tactics instead of stubbornly adhering to what doesn’t work. Eventually, you’ll land on a strategy that succeeds.